23 Comments
User's avatar
Dave Ouzounian's avatar

I always thought "A's" and "C's" were contractions.

Expand full comment
jaybrown's avatar

Ok, I'll bite: contractions of what?

Expand full comment
Paul Britton's avatar

I would note that the excerpt from Reverend Gosnold’s sermon includes a number of misspelled words besides the plurals with apostrophes. It’s not worth much as a precedent!

Near our suburban home, a new set of apartment/condo buildings is going up. Some are already finished and occupied. A sign at the entrance says The Den’s. I grind my teeth every time I drive past.

Expand full comment
jaybrown's avatar

The sermon was from 1644. It's not like there were rigid spelling and grammar rules then.

Expand full comment
Paul Britton's avatar

Exactly. Not useful as a model for either spelling or punctuation.

Expand full comment
jaybrown's avatar

i think Mr. Nordlinger was using it as an example of the variations that widely occur in language, and the historical sources of the variations.

Expand full comment
RustyEggleston's avatar

"Kakistocracy?"

Jay must have been reading Nick Catoggio this week . . . at 67, I had to look up this ancient yet new word also!

Expand full comment
Jay Nordlinger's avatar

!

Expand full comment
George Bascom's avatar

Gen. George S. Patton had some thoughts on the matter of public profanity: “You can’t run an army without profanity; and it has to be eloquent profanity. An army without profanity couldn’t fight its way out of a piss-soaked paper bag. It may not sound nice to some bunch of little old ladies at an afternoon tea party, but it helps my soldiers to remember.”

But General Patton wasn’t a slob. Have no doubt he would have zipped his profane lip on the public stage at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

Expand full comment
Jay Nordlinger's avatar

Thx, GB.

Expand full comment
George Bascom's avatar

General Patton added “When I want it to stick I give it to them double dirty.”

Expand full comment
Freda Salatino's avatar

You have a beautiful, eclectic mind. Start heavy, end heavy, it makes no nevermind. (Yes, I know what I did there.) Thanks for helping me laugh on a day with little laugh-worthy news.

Expand full comment
Jay Nordlinger's avatar

My pleasure, FS!

Expand full comment
Eric Verhulst's avatar

I was a chaplain in the military for many years and, as you'd expect, profanity was ubiquitous. I would tell my sailors and Marines that the problem wasn't the words as such, but the over use. They need to be saved for special occasions or, when those occasions arise, we have no good words for them.

If you'll indulge a brief story...

On the ship, some sailors were discussing some valve in the overhead they were working on, referring to them as f***ing. I stopped and looked at the valves while they continued their conversation and that was the only adjective they used for the valve.

At some point, one of them noticed me and asked, "Need something, Chaps?"

"Well, for the past three minutes you've been saying that valve is f*cking and all I can say is, valve sex is really boring." Then walked away.

Expand full comment
Jay Nordlinger's avatar

Well done!

Expand full comment
John L. Ammirati's avatar

I recall Carter's 1979 "whip his ass" comment causing quite a stir. One commentator humorously excused it by saying that, if Carter and Kennedy had been Republicans, Jimmy would have said "I'll whip his elephant!"

Expand full comment
Jay Nordlinger's avatar

!!

Expand full comment
David Lundry's avatar

Jay, I was taught (and still teach) to never use apostrophes to make plurals with, as you say, single letters the exception (Mr. L only gave 2 A's on his final). The real rule is clarity, I think. If there is no confusion without the apostrophe, leave it out. What are you thoughts on decades and centuries? "They were all born in the 1960s" or "1960's"? I do note in your title "a 1640s sermon" an apostrophe could work as a possessive.

As always, keep up the good work.

Expand full comment
Jay Nordlinger's avatar

Thank you, Dave! I defer to the teacher (namely you) ...

Expand full comment
jaybrown's avatar

Excellent, Mr. Nordlinger. Yes, it "had to be done." But better done with less crowing, lying, self-congratulation, and premature leaks of early intel assessments. When do we get a sane, adult administration?

Expand full comment
TP's avatar

Where does the idea that the misuse of an apostrophe is "hillbilly" come from. Asking for the founder of the wonderful, now extinct, weekly newspaper, "The West Virginia Hillbilly", Jim Comstock. Some credit him with being responsible for JFK winning the WV primary (a crucial vistory) with his satirical column, "Paw Ain'r Selling His Vote To No Catholic." Jim was legendary for devades. Google him, or ask Chris Stirewalt.

Expand full comment
Jay Nordlinger's avatar

I will! Thx, TP.

Expand full comment
TP's avatar

Jim was decades ahead of Mike Rowe in appreciating that a formal education was not necessary for success. He dtarted the fictitious school, The University of Hard Knocks, and held annual "graduation" dinners to recognize the new "alumni." He was the epitome of an old school publisher. And a great writer to boot. He introduced me to the word anon. Best to the best.

Expand full comment