When Father’s Day came around, I published a little essay called “The Lottery of Fathers.” Got some interesting responses, including this one:
I am not a son who followed in his (much smarter!) father’s footsteps. He was a math-and-science whiz. My siblings and I always said to him, “Thanks for the brain that got us through calculus!” Not exactly a warm or comforting human, but we had Mamá for that.
My cousin and I used to observe, “We got dads for calculus and moms to teach us that other people’s feelings matter!” …
At my age, I hope I have the maturity to state unequivocally that my dad did the absolute best he could with the tools he had. …
What I have long said to young people in my shop, when they are struggling with their parents, is, “They do the best they can with the tools they have.”
Another reader writes,
My dad graduated from Superior High School in Superior, Wis., in 1948. The next day he went down to the ore docks and got a job as a coal-shoveler for an old ore boat, and off he went to Erie, Pa. He didn’t even tell his mother. Just took off and came back 45 days later by bus with more money than he had ever known.
He worked his way up the ladder and by the time I was born in 1961 he was a chief engineer with his choice of ships to sail on. His last job was on the Edmund Fitzgerald, fairly early in its life.
Years later, when the Fitz went down, that was a rough day—the only time I saw my dad swig right from the bottle of Jim Beam.
If you would like to write to me, the address is mail@jaynordlinger.com. If you would like to ask questions, ask away. (In this, I borrow a page from my homeboy Matt Labash, who has done “Ask Matt” for years—a great tradition.)
In a column about Ukraine, I wrote the following:
I have frequently cited a statement by Charles Krauthammer, which he made when we were talking about Israel. I had asked him, “Will Israel survive?” Will it be able to overcome, or neutralize, the forces arrayed against it?
Said Krauthammer, “The survival of Israel depends on two things: the will of the people to survive and the support of the United States.”
I have thought, over the last three years, that the same applies to Ukraine. I don’t know. That question is being put to a terrible test.
A reader writes,
A new, key factor to consider re Israel’s survival is whether the younger Jewish population in the U.S. will ultimately stick with or repudiate the Jewish state. My fear is, if Jewish kids repudiate the state, if they renounce their connection to Israel, this will be a turning point for U.S. policy.
An intriguing and good point.
In another column, I had some thoughts on policing. I wrote, for example,
All my life, I have been a defender of law enforcement—maybe a reflexive one. Maybe too reflexive. My bias is on the side of law enforcement. This is probably natural in a conservative.
A reader writes,
As a criminal-defense lawyer, I’m of two minds about our law-enforcement friends. On one hand, I wouldn’t have a job without the work that they do, and their work contributes to making our communities safer and, therefore, more prosperous. (Maybe that’s one hand and a half.) On the other, I get agitated when I see them dressed as combat troops. …
I think that what really bothers me is the militarization of our police departments that’s been going on for the past 40-plus years. I live in a city of about 125,000 people. Our police department is about to acquire another military vehicle. We are not an occupied area, needing a military presence to deter criminal wrongdoing. …
Police departments and their officers ought to comport themselves as though they were members of their community, not adversaries or masters. When I see a cop in tactical gear holding a military weapon, I get the feeling they don’t think that way.
Anyway, longtime hobbyhorse of mine, and a rather unpopular view in my locale.
Another reader writes with something else in mind: these ICE agents in plain clothes and masks:
My grandson is in his first year as a state trooper. He rides alone, and the nearest backup is always miles down the interstate. I don’t understand wearing civilian clothes to enforce the law; the uniform projects authority.
A reader sends me a photo of a letter from WFB, William F. Buckley Jr. He had written to WFB to tell him, among other things, “My wife is concerned that your shirts are wrinkled when you appear on Firing Line.” WFB answered,
Just a note, however belated, to tell you how deeply I appreciated your generous—and charming—letter. And tell Mrs. Johnson I will try to reform.
I once heard Pat Buckley, Bill’s wife, say, “I used to send him out looking nice, but then I gave up.”
In response to something I wrote about Alfred Brendel, the late pianist, a reader says,
Alfred Brendel has meant something special to me too: My wife and I went to see him perform on our first date back when (April 7, 1979, to be precise). I recently found the program on the New York Philharmonic’s website.
With Zubin Mehta on the podium, Brendel played two concertos by Mozart: K. 271 (in E flat) and K. 491 (in C minor).
Sweet.
A reader writes,
A rules question for you. I have a 4 o’clock tee time this afternoon for a 9-hole league match. The temperatures will be in the mid-90s. If I suffer heat stroke during the match, am I required to add that stroke to my score?
!!
In a column, I had a note about Vernor’s, a ginger ale from my home region, southeastern Michigan (Detroit, in particular). A reader writes,
When I lived in Calgary, I had an Albertan friend who had married a New Yorker. One day I called and asked what he was up to:
Him: “My wife is making me a New York drink.”
Me: “An egg cream!”
Him: “How did you know??”We have now permanently relocated from Tennessee to Pewaukee, Wis., where we are learning to drink Sprecher Root Beer and eat cheese curds. …
I think it would be fun if you did a survey of all the unique foods and drinks from every state!
I agree—could make a nifty book.
A reader says,
I think that you will find this amusing. My wife and I sometimes pass through Tappahannock, Va., on the Rappahannock River and the Middle Neck of Virginia. We sometimes stop and have a meal at NN Burger (they have lobster rolls as well).
So, what’s amusing? This sign within:
A reader, bearing pictures himself, writes,
Happy Fourth!
Thought you might enjoy these photos from the annual Webster Groves Fourth of July parade. We are a little ’burb outside of St Louis. Very Mayberry-esque, to my mind. We have a bunch of community festivals—art weekends, the peach festival, etc. …This is a pretty liberal area. Still, as a deep-dyed conservative, I have found all people to be very friendly and happy to leave politics at the door for the sake of friendship and neighborliness. I probably live up to that ideal less than I ought, but I try.
It’s a great place and I’m happy to see small-town American traditions such as Independence Day parades thrive.
What a country!
Have a photo:
My thanks to one and all correspondents. See you soon.
Vernors...never knew where it was from ( I am in OH, next door...lol) but I love it, was always my favorite ginger ale. The flavor is just more hardy.
For the reader from Webster Groves : I am heartened to read that the place has not changed much since I visited a great-aunt there over 50 years ago. She lived close to the high school, making me an even bigger fan of "Lucas Tanner".